Done working on your parenting and still losing your sh*t?
This isn't another parenting book. It's a no-BS pattern interrupt for parents who love their kids deeply and are ready to stop parenting from guilt, shame, survival, and old conditioning.
The new book by award-winning New Zealand
parenting educator Jacqlin Richards.
The new book by award-winning New Zealand parenting educator Jacqlin Richards.
Want to read a chapter first?
AS FEATURED IN & RECOGNISED BY
Rocket Fuel Brainz. The Café
Rocket Fuel Brainz. The Café
Rocket Fuel Brainz. The Café
Rocket Fuel Brainz. The Café
Rocket Fuel Brainz. The Café
Rocket Fuel Brainz. The Café
This book is not about perfect parenting. It is about becoming a more conscious, resourced, and truthful human being, so our children inherit more freedom than fear.
Jacqlin Richards has made a bold and important contribution to the parenting conversation.
When a parent changes the place they are parenting from, the child receives a different world. That is the quiet revolution inside this book.
This book has dirt under its fingernails. It has tears in it. It has laughter in it. It has the quality of someone who has entered her own fire and returned with something useful.
Want a taste of the book before you decide?
Most parents don't realise they're not just reacting in the moment - they're reliving the past.
We're told to be patient, get it right, and raise "good kids." But beneath the pressure, guilt, and constant second-guessing, something deeper is impacting the way we parent.
"Your kid isn't the problem. What's driving you is."
"Your kid isn't the problem.
What's driving you is."
Inherited beliefs, emotional conditioning, unconscious reactions, and nervous-system survival states are keeping old patterns repeating, no matter how much we "know better."
You can’t raise resourced kids
from an unresourced state.
You can’t raise resourced kids from an unresourced state.
This is a different way.
Not more strategies. Not more pressure.
A no-BS path back to yourself.
Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour cuts through the noise of modern parenting and goes straight to the core of what's actually going on.
From survival to connection.
From lead to gold.
This is the shift from reaction to relationship.
A different way.
Not more strategies. Not more pressure.
A no-BS path back to yourself.
Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour cuts through the noise of modern parenting and goes straight to the core of what's actually going on.
From survival to connection.
From lead to gold.
This is the shift from reaction to relationship.
This book isn't about fixing your children.
It's about understanding yourself so you can show up differently with them.
WHO THIS BOOK IS FOR
Parents who want to enjoy their children and the life they're creating together.
Parents who want to understand themselves more deeply, so they can understand their children more fully.
Parents who are open to growth, curiosity, and new possibilities.
Parents who want to parent with greater awareness, grace, humour, and humanity.
Parents who are ready to trust themselves more and pressure themselves less.
Parents who want deeper relationships, not perfect ones.
Parents who want to raise resilient humans by becoming more resourced themselves.
Parents who are ready to experience more peace, freedom, and joy in parenting.
Parents who want to understand how they were parented, so they can parent with greater awareness and intention.
WHO THIS BOOK IS NOT FOR
Parents looking for a formula to guarantee perfectly behaved children.
Parents who want quick fixes without self-reflection.
Parents who believe parenting is only about changing their child’s behaviour or controlling their own.
Parents looking for another parenting rulebook.
Parents who want certainty more than curiosity.
Parents who want parenting strategies without personal growth.
Parents looking for a formula to guarantee perfectly behaved children.
Parents who want quick fixes without self-reflection.
Parents who believe parenting is only about changing their child’s behaviour or controlling their own.
Parents looking for another parenting rulebook.
Parents who want certainty more than curiosity.
Parents who want parenting strategies without personal growth.
This book is not for parents looking for someone else to blame.
It is for parents who are willing to understand themselves.
This book is for parents who are willing to understand themselves. It is not for parents looking for someone else to blame.
Not sure yet?
Read a Free Chapter
Not sure yet?
Read a Free Chapter
Discover why so many of us parent from patterns we didn't consciously choose, and what begins to change when we can finally see them.
Discover why so many of us parent from patterns we didn't consciously choose,
and what begins to change when we can finally see them.
Endorsements
This book could easily be called Parenting By Magic. It's about breaking free of the uphill battle that is the old, stuck, unimaginative, mechanical paradigm of controlling behaviour - your own and your children's.
It invites you to be guided by the wisdom of your heart in serving the highest good and potential of everyone in the family.
Jacqlin Richards is one of the most conscious and dedicated educators I’ve ever met. If you let her guide you on this journey, your life will change — and the people you love will feel the difference.
Jacqlin Richards forges into exciting new territory with F_ck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour, a trailblazing book that invites parents to understand themselves better so they can support their children more effectively in a world that has tilted perilously off its axis.
This book provides an extraordinary new parenting paradigm while sharing the author’s inspiring personal story — one that will ignite possibility in the hearts and minds of readers everywhere. Without a doubt, this book stands to change the trajectory of humanity.
Jacqlin’s story holds a mirror to the journey of reparenting ourselves. Tender, raw, wise, and full of truth, her writing cuts right to the heart of our humanness. It’s humanity’s story. Everyone needs to read this book.
Jacqlin has written a brave and important book for parents who know there has to be another way.
I wish this book had existed when I was raising my daughters.”
This book is a full-body truth bomb; raw, hilarious, confronting, and deeply liberating. Jacqlin’s voice is quirky, unapologetic, and completely on point, cutting through parenting bullshit with compassion, courage, and hard-won wisdom. You won’t read this book and stay the same. It will crack you open, make you laugh out loud, and invite you to parent (and live) with far more honesty, grace, and humanity.
Jacqlin Richards believes the path to empowered, connected parenting lies in self-awareness and the courage to embrace imperfection. By focusing on personal growth and authentic connection, parents can break generational cycles and raise resilient, self-aware children. This book offers a practical, humorous, and deeply human roadmap for this journey.
In over 25 years working with families, I have learned that lasting change never starts with the child. It starts with the parent, and that is exactly where Jacqlin Richards begins. Real, raw, and refreshingly honest, this book reminds us that parenting was never meant to be perfect. With humor and lived experience, she shows how the patterns we inherited shape the way we raise our kids, and offers something far more powerful than perfection: when we heal and grow, our children do too.
Endorsements
This book could easily be called Parenting By Magic. It's about breaking free of the uphill battle that is the old, stuck, unimaginative, mechanical paradigm of controlling behaviour - your own and your children’s. It invites you to be guided by the wisdom of your heart in serving the highest good and potential of everyone in the family.
Jacqlin Richards is one of the most conscious and dedicated educators I’ve ever met. If you let her guide you on this journey, your life will change — and the people you love will feel the difference.
Jacqlin Richards forges into exciting new territory with F_ck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour, a trailblazing book that invites parents to understand themselves better so they can support their children more effectively in a world that has tilted perilously off its axis.
This book provides an extraordinary new parenting paradigm while sharing the author’s inspiring personal story — one that will ignite possibility in the hearts and minds of readers everywhere. Without a doubt, this book stands to change the trajectory of humanity.
In over 25 years working with families, I have learned that lasting change never starts with the child. It starts with the parent, and that is exactly where Jacqlin Richards begins. Real, raw, and refreshingly honest, this book reminds us that parenting was never meant to be perfect. With humor and lived experience, she shows how the patterns we inherited shape the way we raise our kids, and offers something far more powerful than perfection: when we heal and grow, our children do too.
This book is a full-body truth bomb; raw, hilarious, confronting, and deeply liberating. Jacqlin’s voice is quirky, unapologetic, and completely on point, cutting through parenting bullshit with compassion, courage, and hard-won wisdom. You won’t read this book and stay the same. It will crack you open, make you laugh out loud, and invite you to parent (and live) with far more honesty, grace, and humanity.
Jacqlin Richards believes the path to empowered, connected parenting lies in self-awareness and the courage to embrace imperfection. By focusing on personal growth and authentic connection, parents can break generational cycles and raise resilient, self-aware children. This book offers a practical, humorous, and deeply human roadmap for this journey.
Jacqlin has written a brave and important book for parents who know there has to be another way. I wish this book had existed when I was raising my daughters.
Jacqlin’s story holds a mirror to the journey of reparenting ourselves. Tender, raw, wise, and full of truth, her writing cuts right to the heart of our humanness. It’s humanity’s story.
Everyone needs to read this book.
Come Celebrate With Me In Person. The Official Auckland Book Launch Lunch.
Come Celebrate With Me In Person.
The Official Auckland Book Launch Lunch
Thursday 27 August | Non Solo Pizza, Parnell
Thursday 30 July
Non Solo Pizza, Parnell
Come celebrate the launch of F*ck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour in person.
Your ticket includes a signed copy of the book, lunch at Non Solo Pizza, and the chance to meet me and connect with other parents and humans who want to fuck up their kids with a little more grace, humour and honesty.
Limited Tickets Available
Don't just read it. Live it.
Pre-order The Printed Book And
Join the Free Workshop Series
Don't just read it.
Live it.
Pre-order The Book And Join the Free Workshop Series
Disrupting Your Hidden
Parenting Patterns
A 6-Part Live Series for Parents Who Are Done
Reacting and Repeating the Same Shit
A 6-Part Live Series for Parents Who Are Done Reacting and Repeating the Same Shit
These live workshops are designed to help parents uncover the unconscious patterns driving their reactions, relationships, and parenting — so they can stop repeating the past and start consciously creating the family they actually want.
Six live workshops across two weeks. Join live when you can, catch the replays when you can't, and stay connected inside the group for the whole experience.
The workshops are free. Register once and you're in for all six.
Six live workshops across two weeks. Join live when you can, catch the replays when you can't, and stay connected inside the group for the whole experience.
The workshops are free. Register once and you're in for all six.
Week 1: Monday 7th September
Session 1. You’re Parenting from the Past
And your kids are paying for it.
Most parents think they’re reacting to their child — but they’re actually reacting to unresolved history. This workshop exposes the unconscious patterns shaping parenting reactions so parents can stop handing the past to the next generation.
Week 1: Wednesday 9th September
Session 2. The Addiction to Being Needed
Why rescuing feels like love — and isn’t.
Over-helping and over-functioning don’t create resilient kids — they create dependency. This session exposes the hidden codependent dynamics in parenting and shows how stepping out of rescuing allows children to develop real capability and confidence.
Week 1: Friday 11th September
Session 3. Stop Giving Your Power Away
Victim parenting and the illusion of control.
When parents feel powerless, they try to control everything around them. This workshop reveals how blame, projection, and martyrdom quietly shape parenting — and how reclaiming ownership restores clarity, authority, and leadership.
Week 2: Monday 14th September
Session 4. The Addiction to Control
Nothing is broken. Not them. Not you.
Children are being labelled long before they’re understood. This session challenges the pathology narrative and shows parents how changing the meaning they assign to behaviour transforms the way they respond to their children.
WeeK 2: Wednesday 16th September
Session 5. Don’t Lose Yourself Raising Them
End the self-abandonment.
Many parents slowly disappear inside the role of parenting while trying to resolve deeper beliefs about worth and being “good enough.” This workshop reconnects parents to their wholeness so they can lead from creativity, clarity, and grounded authority instead of guilt and self-sacrifice.
Week 2: Friday 18th September
Session 6. Raise Them in Possibility, Not Fear
The revolution starts in your living room.
Most parents are focused on what they don’t want. This final workshop shifts parents from fear-based problem management into conscious creation — helping them parent from vision instead of reaction.
The Book Gives You the Truth.
The Workshops Help You Live It.
90-minute sessions | Six workshops over two weeks
Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, 11am NZT | Replays included
90-minute sessions
Six workshops over two weeks
Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays
11am NZT | Replays included
Most people will read the book. Some will recognise themselves in it.
A smaller number will actually do the work required to change the patterns running their parenting.
These live workshops are designed to help parents move from insight into embodiment — disrupting the unconscious reactions, beliefs, and behaviours that keep getting repeated at home.
Because parenting differently isn’t about knowing more.
It’s about becoming conscious enough to stop repeating the same patterns, especially in the moments that matter most.
Shift from control, guilt, and pressure into connection, clarity, and leadership.
Shift from control, guilt, and pressure into connection, clarity, and leadership.
Book Pre-Sale
$29 USD
For parents who are ready to stop repeating the same patterns and start parenting with more awareness, connection, and truth.
Paperback copy of Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour
Limited signed pre-sale copies available
Delivered straight to your door so you can dive right in
Free access to the 6-part live workshop series included (join live or catch the replays)
Pre-sale copies will ship as soon as the first print run is available. Shipping calculated at checkout
Official Auckland Book Launch Lunch
$148 NZD
Thursday 27 August | Non Solo Pizza, Parnell
For Auckland locals, friends, supporters, and parents who want to celebrate the book launch in person.
Lunch at Non Solo Pizza
Signed copy of Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour
Meet Jacqlin in person and celebrate the launch
Connect with other parents and humans who give a shit about doing things differently
Register for Free Workshop Series
Got the Book already? Or just want to join the Workshops?
For parents who know that reading alone won't shift the pattern, and want to actually do the work.
All 6 live workshops (7-18 September)
Replay access included
Be welcomed into the WolfPack to feel the energy of this parenting revolution and be part of something bigger
Be surrounded by parents who give a shit and are committed to doing things differently
Register once and you'll receive the workshop details, reminders, and replay links by email.
Most people will read the book.
Some will take a first step.
The workshops are free.
There's no reason not to find out which one you'll be.
This isn’t just information.
It’s a lived experience.
This isn’t just information.
It’s a lived experience.
Real people. Real conversations. Real shifts.
Real people.
Real conversations.
Real shifts.
These workshops are designed to create awareness in the moments that matter most, not just while you’re watching.
The Amazon launch is July 28.
Join the VIP Book Launch Group and be part of the push to take Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour to bestseller.
About Jacqlin Richards
Jacqlin Richards is a Parenting Alchemist, speaker, award-winning educator, mother of two boys, author of Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour, and creator of The Resourced Parenting Method™.
Her work helps parents stop parenting from survival, guilt, shame, fear, and old conditioning — and begin leading their families with truth, presence, capacity, connection, and play.
2025 Gold Award Winner
Women Changing the World – Adult Education & Training.
2025 Gold Award Winner
Women Changing the World - Adult Education & Training.
Frequently Asked Questions
My kids are older. Is this book still for me?
Yes. Parenting is the long game. You do not stop being a parent when your child becomes a teenager, a young adult, or even a fully grown adult. This book helps you understand the patterns, reactions, expectations, and unconscious beliefs that shaped how you parented — and how you can relate, repair, and show up differently from here.
What if I feel like I’ve already fucked up my kids?
Then this book is especially for you. The point is not to go back and do it perfectly. None of us can. The point is to stop drowning in shame and start meeting the truth with responsibility, grace, humour, and the willingness to repair.
Is it too late to change my relationship with my child?
No. It is never too late to bring more honesty, humility, ownership, and connection into a relationship. It may not happen overnight, and it may not look exactly how you imagined, but the way you show up now still matters.
What if my adult child is distant or estranged?
This book will not give you a script to force a relationship. It will help you look at what may be underneath the disconnection — control, expectation, hurt, shame, protection, resentment, or old patterns — and begin relating from a more honest and responsible place.
Is this book only for parents with young children?
No. This book is for parents at every stage, and for anyone who has ever been parented. It speaks to the patterns we inherit, the wounds we carry, the reactions we repeat, and the possibility of changing what happens next.
Is this a parenting strategy book?
Not in the traditional sense. This is not another book of scripts, hacks, or quick fixes. It goes underneath behaviour and asks what is driving the parent in the first place.
Will this make me feel worse about my parenting?
No. This book is honest, raw, and confronting, but it is not here to bury parents in shame. It is about responsibility without shame — seeing clearly enough to change without making yourself bad for being human.
Is this book for fathers too?
Yes. Jacqlin writes from her lived experience as a mother, but the work is for mothers, fathers, caregivers, grandparents, and anyone who wants to understand parenting and being parented differently.
What if I had a difficult childhood?
This book was written for that conversation. It explores how our early experiences shape the way we relate, react, protect, control, disconnect, and parent. It is not about blaming your parents. It is about understanding what shaped you so you can stop unconsciously repeating it.
Will there be workshops with the book?
Yes. A free live workshop series based on the book is coming. The workshops will help readers take the ideas from the page and apply them in real life, with more depth, support, and practical integration.
About Jacqlin Richards
Jacqlin Richards is a Parenting Alchemist, speaker, award-winning educator, mother of two boys, author of Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour, and creator of The Resourced Parenting Method™.
Her work helps parents stop parenting from survival, guilt, shame, fear, and old conditioning — and begin leading their families with truth, presence, capacity, connection, and play.
2025 Gold Award Winner
Women Changing the World – Adult Education & Training.
2025 Gold Award Winner
Women Changing the World - Adult Education & Training.
About Jacqlin Richards
Jacqlin Richards is a Parenting Alchemist, speaker, award-winning educator, mother of two boys, author of Fuck Up Your Kids with Grace & Humour, and creator of The Resourced Parenting Method™.
Her work helps parents stop parenting from survival, guilt, shame, fear, and old conditioning — and begin leading their families with truth, presence, capacity, connection, and play.
2025 Gold Award Winner
Women Changing the World – Adult Education & Training.
2025 Gold Award Winner
Women Changing the World - Adult Education & Training.
Frequently Asked Questions
My kids are older. Is this book still for me?
Yes. Parenting is the long game. You do not stop being a parent when your child becomes a teenager, a young adult, or even a fully grown adult. This book helps you understand the patterns, reactions, expectations, and unconscious beliefs that shaped how you parented — and how you can relate, repair, and show up differently from here.
What if I feel like I’ve already fucked up my kids?
Then this book is especially for you. The point is not to go back and do it perfectly. None of us can. The point is to stop drowning in shame and start meeting the truth with responsibility, grace, humour, and the willingness to repair.
Is it too late to change my relationship with my child?
No. It is never too late to bring more honesty, humility, ownership, and connection into a relationship. It may not happen overnight, and it may not look exactly how you imagined, but the way you show up now still matters.
What if my adult child is distant or estranged?
This book will not give you a script to force a relationship. It will help you look at what may be underneath the disconnection — control, expectation, hurt, shame, protection, resentment, or old patterns — and begin relating from a more honest and responsible place.
Is this book only for parents with young children?
No. This book is for parents at every stage, and for anyone who has ever been parented. It speaks to the patterns we inherit, the wounds we carry, the reactions we repeat, and the possibility of changing what happens next.
Is this a parenting strategy book?
Not in the traditional sense. This is not another book of scripts, hacks, or quick fixes. It goes underneath behaviour and asks what is driving the parent in the first place.
Will this make me feel worse about my parenting?
No. This book is honest, raw, and confronting, but it is not here to bury parents in shame. It is about responsibility without shame — seeing clearly enough to change without making yourself bad for being human.
Is this book for fathers too?
Yes. Jacqlin writes from her lived experience as a mother, but the work is for mothers, fathers, caregivers, grandparents, and anyone who wants to understand parenting and being parented differently.
What if I had a difficult childhood?
This book was written for that conversation. It explores how our early experiences shape the way we relate, react, protect, control, disconnect, and parent. It is not about blaming your parents. It is about understanding what shaped you so you can stop unconsciously repeating it.
Will there be workshops with the book?
Yes. A free live workshop series based on the book is coming. The workshops will help readers take the ideas from the page and apply them in real life, with more depth, support, and practical integration.
